Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Keep Away From The Kids

Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even G-d's omnipotence did not extend to G-d's kids. After creating heaven and earth, G-d created Adam and Eve. And the first thing he said was, "Don't."

"Don't what?" Adam replied.

"Don't eat the forbidden fruit," G-d said.

"Forbidden fruit? We got forbidden fruit? Hey, Eve...we got forbidden fruit!"

"No way!"

"Way!"

"Don't eat that fruit!" said G-d.

"Why?"

"Because I am your Father and I said so!" said G-d (wondering why he hadn't stopped after making the elephants). A few minutes later G-d saw his kids having an apple break and was angry.

"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" G-d asked.

"Uh huh, " Adam replied.

"Then why did you?"

"I dunno" Eve answered.

"She started it!" Adam said.

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"DID NOT!"

Having had it with the two of them, G-d's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern
was set and it has never changed. If G-d had trouble handling children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?

Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two and keep away from children. 

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